When New Hampshire parents divorce, it will certainly have an impact on the youngest members of the family. The end of your marriage, however, does not mean it is the end of your right as a father or the importance of your role in the lives of your kids. It may be helpful for you to consider ways you can be a strong and active dad after divorce.
Being a single dad is not easy, but there are ways you can optimize the time you have with your children, even if it is not as much as you hoped it would be. When you are intentional about how you use the time you have, it can be a more fulfilling experience for both you and your children. Of course, part of this is securing a fair custody and visitation order.
Approaching your role with intention
Divorce will mean that you may not get to see your kids as much as you used to, or it may mean significant changes in your schedule. The end of a marriage will require significant adjustment for all parties involved, but that does not mean you cannot still have strong and healthy relationships with your kids.
Fathers often have to fight for equitable parenting time, but family law courts are now more likely to order joint custody than in the past. What you do with your parenting time is up to you – and it is smart to explore ways to make it count and make post-divorce life easier for your kids. You can do that with any of the following:
- Try to be as consistent as possible with the other parent, especially in regards to discipline. This can make it easier for kids to go back and forth between homes.
- Try to work amicably with the other parent. It can be stressful and discouraging for kids to see their parents fighting or speaking poorly about each other.
- Try to emphasize the quality of the time you spend with your kids, not necessarily the quantity of the time. You can make the choice to get as much as possible out of your allotted parenting time.
The foundation of any good parenting plan and amicable co-parenting relationship is securing a fair and thoughtful custody and visitation order in divorce. One way you can do this is by setting aside hard feelings and other temporary emotions for the benefit of the kids. When you put them first, it will make this difficult time of transition a bit easier.