What are the unexpected pitfalls of nesting?

On Behalf of | Feb 9, 2023 | Child Custody |

Nesting is a popular arrangement that keeps the children of a divorcing couple in the family home during negotiations and sometimes even long after the divorce is final. Although nesting can provide many advantages for children of divorce, the arrangement can pose drawbacks if New Hampshire parents don’t prepare for them when heading into the arrangement.

What is nesting?

Nesting is a parenting arrangement where children remain in the family home while their parents rotate in and out according to a set schedule. This arrangement provides various benefits, most notably a stable structure for children whose parents are negotiating a divorce, as they get to remain in familiar surroundings. It also provides a way for spouses to get a break from each other by minimizing conflict so that any potential fighting will stop.

Common nesting pitfalls

Problems can occur with nesting when parents don’t think through possible problems when they draft a nesting agreement. Nesting is supposed to deflate tensions, but if you continue to fight, take steps like making your meetings short to minimize conflicts.

At some point, you or your spouse will have a love interest. Avoid bringing your new partner into the home to prevent meltdowns. It’s also helpful to work out how you will share information about the kids in your nesting agreement.

Keeping the focus on your children

Most divorcing couples have their children’s best interests in mind. Devising a parenting plan like nesting indicates that you are aware of their needs and want to minimize the stress involved in your divorce.

Drafting a compatible parenting agreement takes time. If you decide that nesting is the best situation for your family, begin work on the agreement as soon as possible after your separation to ensure that you cover all potential conflicts. If an unexpected one occurs, try to find creative ways to deflate the situation.